one thing.
Tuesday, June 24, 2008 3:27 PM
Time is the best author.
It always writes the perfect ending.
i got lost in time,again.
just as i thought that today is wednesday. rightt!
well,it's only tuesday,though. but still,time flies so fast! ):
and today is the off day and i need some rest.
my legs are aching and been having cramps,lately.
Optimism means expecting the best,
but confidence means knowing how to handle the worst.
once in my life,i took my family for granted.
well,of course. being a 12 going on 13 year old teenager,
we need attention and love from our parents,don't we?
that was the point of time where i lacked attention from them.
and so,i was all by myself and alone and gasping for answers.
that's when i started to turn to friends of mine.
and it started from there,where i always put friends before family.
it was during a rebellious period of time where you never cared.
and being cool and all shit were what we cared of.
study was just another phase of our lives back then.
and everything that my parents used to say are always ignored.
and slowly,i grew up. i've learnt alot from all my heartbreaks,back then.
when i was 16,i met someone 6 years older who used to be someone special.
he taught me a lot about life and things. he always prioritized his family..
and when he left me back then,all i did was thinking and pure thinking.
all he said was coming right through me as i live each day of my life.
and it got to me one day when i start being a little bit responsible.
and then,i met madee. still,i was not at least responsible of my life.
i was still immature,irresponsible and all i thought about was partying.
i have been through alot with him. of all the things he taught and said.
slowly through this relationship,with alot of rude remarks and scolding from him,
i learnt to not take my family for granted. i learnt to appreciate all the single things.
i was aware that my sisters and brother need guidance from someone like me.
my parents look up to me as an elder sister for something.
i learnt that parents,as you got older,they will let go of you.
thinking that you need less attention as you are big enough to think for yourself.
but no,they are wrong and they don't know what's in store for us.
but all i know,i learnt to take my responsibilities in hand.
truth to be told,i've stopped being what we are suppose to do with our parents.
that is,to respect them,to held their hands before going off anywhere..
and when the boy once told me with all the things he did,
i felt ashamed. i felt ashamed that i failed as an elder sister.
an as a role model,i was nothing to them. i was a failure.
i took mum for granted. i took dad for granted once he make mistake.
i told myself,humans are never perfect. everyone makes mistakes.
and when dad did what he did,i just couldn't accept the fact.
i lost respect for him and for mum too,eventually.
but things change and he began to change,slowly.
and truthfully,i changed as time passes. i tend to appreciate them.
and mum,though that i don't say it to you,i love you.
though we are not always at each other best sides at any point,
i cherish you alot. and i'm sorry for the things i used to say.
and dad,though you have many mistakes that you did,
i know you're willing to change for the sake of our family.
and i wanna say thank you for trying and being you.
i hope that as time goes by,you will still be you,the head of our family.
families are important part of your life.
though some may disagree with what they are going through or otherwise,
eventually,you will learn to understand bit by bit.
parents? they love you even if their way of telling are different in many ways.
i know my sisters still haven't realized this,for a fact.
but when they got older and learnt,i know they will understand.
slowly,they will appreciate and treasure them.
If you search your heart and listen to its instructions,
you’ll end up where you belong.
and babe,thank you for being the best.
you're the one who open my eyes to things.
i love you. please come home soon.
loveeeeee;
effffffff.
Time is the best author. 
